Finding God in the Dark

I remember the very first time that I was sitting in the Ad Deum Group and not knowing what to expect. After a couple of sessions it became clear to me that I was on a spiritual journey of learning that I had been searching for. During the times of meeting every week I noticed that the fellowship within the group became stronger.

I pursued this opportunity to go into the prison because I wanted to do some exploring in between college semesters. However, it turned into more of a personal journey through which I gained perspective on my own life as I experienced and learned about the lives of the people I met. It was impossible not to appreciate the strength of human spirit and perseverance at this place where everyone has a difficult story to tell.

My son has caused me heartache since he was about 14-15 years old. He is now 31 and serving his 2nd prison term. For the first time I am starting to see the beginning of a change in his life. I know he has been attending the Ad Deum Programs and I can only say thank you from the bottom of my heart.

I am an alcoholic/addict involved in the Ad Deum Program. I can now acknowledge that I have been closed out from my inner-most emotions and only would show my emotions as RAGE! After participating in the Ad Deum Programs, I can honestly say that I have a soft side.

For me forgiveness is as mysterious as love. I’ve never understood how people who experience pain through violence can see any light or any freedom from the obsession of why or how? I’ve never really believed that I would forgive, but then nor have I ever really understood the cage which anger locks you into.

A Catholic approach to criminal justice requires that we not give up on those who violate society’s laws. It recognizes that social causes and personal choices can both be factors in crime; it strives to combine helping the offender to accept responsibility for his wrongdoing, but at the same time it insists that every effort be made for their rehabilitation and return to society. We believe that both victims and their offenders are children of God. Despite their very different claims on the conscience and intervention of society, the lives and dignity of both must always be protected and respected.

Restorative justice introduced an element of humanity into a situation which had dehumanized both the attacker and myself. The process may seem difficult, but I think victims and offenders can get so much out of it. The only way to resolve conflicts between people is to sit together, talk, and find a way to move forward.